The Conflict of Warfare

I wonder why it’s so hard to understand

The most serious spiritual battles

Take place in the inner man

For the lover of God

There is no greater stress

Than the battles that transpire between Spirit & flesh

Resist the devil and he will flee

How exactly do I resist when he’s part of me?

If loving that man is wrong I don’t wanna be right

But I long to be pleasing in God’s sight

I’m struggling and it seems no one can see

I guess it’s because the conflict takes place inside of me

I go to church, read the Word and I pray

But when he calls me late at night I don’t always say

NO

But I want to oh so bad

Am I really saved or do I need to rededicate again?

Is there any escape from this life of sin?

Like Paul the very thing I hate to do

Is the very thing I do again

Dag! Somebody help me

Can anybody see

How in the world do I crucify

This part of me that’s fighting not to die

 They say “She really doesn’t love God”

But that’s not my reality

The truth is, it’s my love for Him

Keeping me from completely giving in

Hold on before you make a judgment

About my spirituality

I’d prefer you offer up some prayer

And some accountability

It may not be the lure of sex

That pulls you off your path

Could it be guilt from your abortion

That makes you over eat

Maybe you just talk too much

Do you ever lie or cheat

Whatever your secret battle

There’s only one way victory is won

Is life hidden in God’s only Son

Let His love constrain you

Let His Word re-train you

Don’t run from Him

Run to Him

It’s His power that sets you free from sin

Your own striving and struggling leads to failure again

Remember He is greater than any trap of sin

I may not be perfect but I’m better than before

The more I look at Jesus, the more I win the war

I don’t answer the late night calls

Near as often as I use to

I’m learning that if I resist him

He will flee

As long as I remember

That sin isn’t the real Me!

Love your job? You should!

One of the biggest issues with creating a job we love is our belief system. We are conditioned to think work/career has to be a certain way and we follow that path even when it leaves us unfulfilled in some area. Most people have jobs to meet their needs alone. A job should fulfill your passion and pay your bills. In order to create a job that does both you must deal with your thinking. My strategy is actually get go clear about that God wants more for me and then work with Him to create it. 

This could mean starting a business or simply redefining how you view and value your skills, talents and strengths. I personally believe that God cares about where we work, how much we make and whether we enjoy our work because it affects every other area of our lives. If you hate your job, your family certainly suffers from that and it makes sharing God's love in action at work extremely difficult. Anyway, below are some steps that I've put together. Tell me what you think. Do you see how they can assist you is your quest for a new job?



1. Decide that working a job that you allows you to be your best you AND pays you handsomely IS THE WILL OF GOD! Apply John 10:10 to your career. God wants you to have job that pays abundantly and allows you to fulfill your dreams. The enemy wants to steal that from you by keeping you tied to a job simply because it pays the bills. Spend time in God’s word and with



2. Imagine what that job would look like. Many people say they want a better job and more money, but what does that really look like for you? Do you want to make $50.00 more annually or $50,000? What time do want to work? Do you want to work from home? Too many people underestimate the value of their imagination, but until you can see it internally you’ll never live it externally. Even God created the world based on an inner vision. You’re created to do the same! So get clear about what it looks like.

3. Write it down – The Bible tells us to write the vision and make it plain so where’s your vision concerning your job? Don’t just write it, read it continually and make a confession that you say over it. For example, “Father I thank you that you have given me the gift working with numbers and I use that gift to build wealth for my family and advance the kingdom.” I thank you that my gifts allow me to make at least 100,000 annually. I work with people that I like and like me. It is a pleasant, relaxed and productive environment. I am an asset to my company because I am constantly added value by solving problems and making the company more profitable. As a result, I continuously experience increase on my job.” I could go on and on, but you get the picture.



4. Research – What industries or jobs best fit your personality? There are lots of free personality and job assessment tools online, take advantage of them.



5. Find Mentors – Who has done what you want to do? Who has a job that seems cool to you? Invite them out for lunch or coffee (you pay) and pick their brains. Come prepared with questions to ask…don’t waste their time. If you don’t have anyone close, read and read and read! Someone has done something similar to what you desire; you just have to search them out.



6. Create it – If the job you want doesn’t exist; create it. You can do that by using your faith to call it into existence or by literally starting a company that does what you need. Even the job you work today was created by someone…why not you?



7. Be committed to your goal, but flexible in your approach – Whether the goal is to be a VP or small business owner there are so many different paths! If something doesn’t work out, keep moving forward! Too many people get stuck because they are more focused on the mistake than what they learned from it. Mistakes are a part of life. If you decide something is right for you, change directions…it’s okay to do that!



8. Invest in yourself – You may have to go to job that you really don’t like right now, but what are you doing in your free time? What are you reading on your lunch break? What are you learning while you sit in the car while the kids are at soccer practice? If you want something different, you have to learn something different.



Let me leave you with this: I’ve watched my husband create his dream job several times by doing what I shared above. Once a company set up an office in Arkansas to do a new program and he got the job…it paid what he wanted and let him work from home a lot. Another time, a company restructured so he could work from home just to have him on their team. It can be done, if you will believe.

I’m personally creating a company that allows me to do what I love “Helping people win in Life” and still be present and active for my and pastor. In order to do it, I gave up my t.v. time but I gain additional income doing what I love. If we can do it, you can do too! Let me know your progress!

No Envy Allowed – Embrace What Makes You Special

If you’ve read any of my previous posts, I’m sure you know that I believe EVERYONE was born with God given dreams. We are each created with a unique combination of giftings, talents, passion and personality. When properly cultivated we can live a life that honors God, blesses others and gives us personal satisfaction. I’ve encountered many people who believe that following God means the abandonment of all their dreams. And if that dream included being the biggest drug dealer in the United States or a stripper then I would agree because I can assure you God has better dreams than a life of crime or a career that demoralizes women. However, if your dream has the ability to help people live a better life then it’s probably from God. It’s important to recognize that dreams of becoming a doctor, lawyer, musician, rapper, entrepreneur, dancer or teacher can be inspired by the heart of God. God is interested in touching people in every arena and to do that He needs people who love Him and love their jobs to make that happen. For this reason, God puts different dreams in the hearts of different people, but each dream will help fulfill God’s desire to touch humanity. Don’t allow anyone to tell you that your dream isn’t from God, but God.

In Rick Warren’s book, “The Purpose Driven Life” he talks about gift envy and gift projection. Gift envy is when we are jealous of the gifts of another. We wish that we could be like someone else, the same voice, or knack for decorating, but that my friend, is an insult to the creativity of God. According to Psalm 139 we are each fearfully and wonderfully made and God took great care in forming each of us. To prefer another’s giftings over our own is to minimize what God has placed in you. We must remember that there are many gifts, but one Spirit. Each gift matters and has the ability to impact the world in a life changing way. Each person matters to God. Don’t waste time comparing yourself to others. Celebrate who God has made you! Don’t waste your time being envious instead identify and cultivate what God has placed in you to be used to honor Him and impact the world.

Gift projection is the tendency to expect or demand that others are passionate about whatever we are passionate about. I must admit that I’ve been guilty of this on a few occasions especially where my husband is concerned. Have you ever done that? I love to read and to write and I’ve held him hostage quite a few times making him listen to me read something that I considered “life changing.” I’ve FINALLY learned that God wired us differently. We have different interests, passions and abilities. When we use those differences to complement each other then we are left without weaknesses. I don’t have the right to make him passionate about what I’m passionate about. God made us different. The same is true for the Body of Christ and the world at large.  Imagine the world if everyone wanted to be a firefighter, we’d have an abundance of firefighters, but we’d lack in every other area. Who would teach our kids, run our government and feed the hungry? We need to learn to value our gifts and to value the gifts of those around us. We should resist both the urge to be like others and the urge to make others be like us.

I once read a quote that said, “Whenever we choose to live out our full potential, we give those around use permission to do the same.” Can you imagine the problems we could solve if everyone walked in their purpose? Would education be different if every teacher LOVED to teach and taught at the level the best suited his/her personality? If you’ve ever encountered a teacher who loves to teach, you know there’s a big difference in the quality of work he/she does. I’ve had teacher who literally changed my life because of their passion. What if people selected careers based off passion and purpose instead of just for a paycheck? Would there be an increase in productivity and solutions? I believe so because there is great satisfaction in doing what you were born to do.

Here are a few questions to help you gain clarity:

1. What are your gifts and talents?
2. What are you passionate about?
3. Do you believe this passion is from God?
4. How are you using them to impact your world?
5. What steps could you take to make your passion profitable?
6. Who has done what you want to do? Who could serve as a mentor?

Answering these questions is a great place to start, but now you have to act. Where can you start using your gifts immediately? Someone, somewhere is waiting on you! 

Progress or Excuses: The difference between winners & losers

Progress is defined as “onward movement” to a destination. Have you ever noticed that we expect progress from others? If you have kids, you expect to see the way they clean their room or the kitchen improve. We don’t expect to tell them the same things at 16 that we had to tell them at 6. Who wants to wake a 14 year old up to go to be bathroom to avoid an accident? Not one of us. We also demand progress from those around us. We expect our spouses, friends and co-workers to improve. We don’t want to keep talking about the same issue. We expect our places of employment to make progress. Please don’t pay us the same wages as when we started. When people and situations don’t make progress we get frustrated. Have you ever talked to your spouse about telling your kids the same thing repeatedly? Or talked to your “good” girlfriend about how tired you are of dealing with the same situation with your hubby? I bet you have! It’s easy to see when others need to make progress, but do you require progress from yourself?

I attended four parent teacher conferences this week and I noticed that all of the teachers talked about growth and progress. Each teacher explained where my child had started, where he or she was currently and what they were expected to do to make “satisfactory” progress. Throughout our childhood, our parents, teachers and coaches set benchmarks for us. They tell us what’s expected and how to measure if we’re improving, but once we’re out of school and organized sports, how do we continue to measure our progress? Do we even care? Are we content to live year in and year out dealing with the same problems? How do you tell whether you are growing? What is your measuring stick? Are you making "satisfactory" progress?

There’s an old saying, “If you plan to fail, you fail to plan.” I must admit it took me a little time to accept this as a truth for my life. By nature, I’m kind of a fly by the seat of my pants girl…if you know what I mean! So the thought of actually writing down a plan seemed a little restrictive to me. But after being self reflective, I noticed I wasn’t making any substantial progress in certain areas of my life. The more I read about planning and goal setting, the more clearly I could see that my failure to plan was the reason I was stagnant in those areas.

These questions are examples that will help you locate where you are and clarify where you want to go.

1. What do I want my life to look like in 1 year, including health, wealth, relationships and spiritual walk?

 

2. Where am I now in these areas?

3. What will it take for me to get from where I am currently to where I want to be?

 

4. What will I gain if I accomplish these goals?

 

5. What will I lose if I don’t accomplish these goals?

It’s not enough to want progress; we need strategic steps to get there because nothing just happens! Change doesn’t have to take forever, but it must be purposeful. It must be a conscious decision to consistently make quality choices that agree with our goals. Developing a written plan that I revisit often helps me remember why I’m not eating chocolate cake or why I’m not going to the mall with my girlfriends because a compelling why, helps me stay focused and progressing.

If you are ready to move forward then , don’t just think about it…INK it! Put it in writing! 

Without a written vision to guide your daily decision making you’ll struggle to make progress and

Take a Risk Called Faith

About three years ago, I felt a sense of frustration with my life. Even though I had a good life, I couldn’t shake the sense that there was something more that I was called to contribute. It’s not like being a wife, mom and pastor left me with a lot of free time, but in my heart I knew that I wasn’t maximizing my full capacity. The journey wasn’t easy. The first step was admitting that as good as things were, I knew I could be better. The second was leaving the comfort zone of good, to pursue great. I spent two and a half years prayerfully completing personal development exercises. I learned that a lot of times I played it safe, no limit pushing or testing just doing what I thought was expected of me. While safe playing it safe was easy and didn’t create any waves, it was also boring and predictable.

The question that changed my life was “What do people come to you for?” As I reflected over my life, I realized that people had always come to me for encouragement and empowerment. If you thought you couldn’t, I made you believe you could. That’s a gift I got from my grandmother who raised me. She never told me once that I couldn’t accomplish something. She was my biggest cheerleader. She told me every day of my life that I was smart and pretty and I believed her. I was 27 when my grandmother passed and I felt like the air had been taken from my sails, who would tell me that I could do it now? Who would cheer me on? I didn’t realize the impact that her passing had on my ability to live fearlessly. After her death, I learned to play life safe which meant only doing what you knew you could do. Nothing changed until I decided to push myself out of the box.

The journey led to pursuing a master’s degree in sports psychology. Almost every time someone who knew me heard that I was going back to school, they said, “Don’t you have enough to do?” I learned that just because our days are filled with things, doesn’t mean it’s all we should do or are capable of doing. Taking those classes only confirmed by belief that people need more than inspiration to change, they needed "know how." The next step of the journey was life coaching. It happened by accident (I thought). I started posting encouragement on Facebook and my inbox got flooded with questions. I answered them to the best of my ability. Then a lady said, “I’ll pay you to coach me.” WOW! What a minute! There are people who pay for what I do for free. I had heard of life coaches, but didn’t really know what they did. I soon discovered, they did what I had been doing my WHOLE life for free because it never occurred to me that it could be a job. The story on how I learned to get comfortable accepting pay for what came naturally is one I’ll save for another day. After this lady, there were others some paid, some not, but each one I used an opportunity to perfect this gift God gave me.

The ability to work with someone over a period of time to recreate their lives gave me a satisfaction beyond what I could have imagined in a very different sense than being a pastor. As of today I have about 8 clients that I meet weekly with. I’m learning how to build the business, using every opportunity to learn and be more effective. The frustration I felt a few years ago is gone.

I don’t know where you are in your journey…maybe you don’t have clue what you want to do  but you know you’re ready for change or maybe you know exactly what you want to do, but you’ve allowed fear to hold you back. Well allow me to encourage you to take the risk called faith. If you move forward, God has a way of directing you where you need to go.

Oh yea, remember earlier when I said, I wondered who would be my cheerleader after my grandmother passed? I learned how to be my own cheerleader. I had the power the whole time and so do you! 

New Beginnings for Moms

“Behold I will do a new thing; now it shall spring forth; shall you not know it? I will even make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert.” Isaiah 43:19

This is a season of firsts. My baby Canaan started kindergarten. Jordan started 1st grade, but desperately misses her beloved kindergarten teacher who retired. Caleb is a 5th grader and at school for the first time without Chase. Chase is now in 6th grade at the middle school. Taylor is 16 and is a licensed driver. As we’ve prepared for all of these firsts, I’ve noticed that with firsts come both excitement and apprehension. We both like and fear the new. While I’m excited about the new seasons my children are experiencing, there is also that feeling of the unknown. I’m glad that Taylor can drive, but should I let her drive alone? She reminded me the other day that the only way that I would know that she could drive alone was to allow her to drive alone. Deep sigh…She’s right and I know it.

For the first time in 10 years, all my kids are in school. That’s a new thing for me and I’m excited yet a little unsure of what the new will bring. I know I’m not the only one because I’ve watched my Facebook friends share their mixed emotions about the changes that come when the baby goes to school. The truth is we can’t stop change. We can’t hold our children in limbo while we get ready. We have to embrace the new and learn from it. They aren’t just changing…we are changing too!

When you’ve defined yourself as a stay at home mom, what do you do now that all the kids are gone? There can be a sense of loss because time that use to be filled with Nick Jr. is now open to really do whatever you desire. The problem is often, you don’t know what you desire. I realized this last year when Canaan went to preschool so I started working on what I wanted to do next. I’ll admit it wasn’t easy. I'll still learning to create a world that balances my desire to be a great mom with my desire to do something that matters with the rest of my day. When you’ve spent years just being wherever your kids needed you to be, it can be a challenge to figure out what to do when they don’t need you from 8-3.

A Facebook mom posted the other day “Who am I if I’m not a mom?” Great question! This is a great place to start the discussion and begin the journey of developing the rest of you.

Questions to consider:

What do I like to do?

What have I always wanted to do, but couldn’t because I was raising small children?


What would I like to learn to do? What would be an ideal day for me?


What am I passionate about? What cause am I connected to?

Is this a time to go back to school, start a new job or business, get in shape, pick up an old passion or a new hobby? Well, it could be…if you decide it is. You have options.

You are a mom, but being a mom isn’t your only gift. God equipped you with gifts and talents that the world needs. Now is a great time to learn about you. I know that there is a tendency to feel that after you’ve spent years raising kids that you don’t have much to offer the world, but the truth is being a mom has taught you skills that make you more effective to the world. You just need to identify what you know and how you can use it to make a difference.

Father, please help all moms who struggling to find their place as their children transition into new seasons. Help them to see that You care about their dreams as well. Stir up dreams, passions and ideas that will make our world a better place. Help them to know what they should do next. Help them transition effectively in this new season. In Jesus’ name, Amen!

I Choose

I refuse to be defined

Confined by labels

Society tries to stick on me

Carving out limitations

Based on gender, race, or nationality

I am not restricted to merely repeat

That which has already been achieved

Endless potential within my soul

Maybe a cure to cancer or HIV

God wrote out my purpose

From beginning to end

By my choices I decide

If I lose or if I win

SO I choose victory

Living life giving God glory

Taking my place in history

Touching society in a way

That is uniquely me

Unwilling to become

A cheap carbon copy

Embracing the Designer’s plan

A vision of originality

Life may attempt

To place me in a category

But only I have the ability

To determine what I become

I chose CHAMPION!

 

Imagine what could happen if we all choose to live out of our potential than our limitations? What if we taught our kids to live the same way? I think we could make an impact in the world, a mark that can't be erased. I don't know what you were created to do, but I do know that your gifts matter to the world or God wouldn't haven't put it inside of you! I'd love for you to share your dream below. Tell me what you're working on so I can pray for you! Have a great day!